Mall observations . . .

Walking through the mall today some things cannot go unnoticed . . . .

• The strong perfume smell that drifts into the mall from the Victoria Secret store can cause an instant migraine headache.
• If another 19 year old makeup specialist that looks like a Vogue model behind the counter at Macy's tries to tell a 51 year old (guess who) how to put on her makeup and moisturize I will punch them. How do you know how to take care of older skin? . . . hmmpfff . . .
• There are more guys over 30 years old in the Lego store than kids.
• Verizon, T-mobile, Sprint, Cricket, AT&T will all attack you at the mall from their kiosks, you will have no excuse to not have a cell phone purchased and contract signed by the time you leave the mall (flashbacks to the time share salesmen!).
• 90% of all the people at the mall are wearing flip flops, I swear!. . where are the shoes?
• It's apparently a requirement that to work at Hot Topic you must have a minimum of 5 piercings and 3 tattoos.
• You can NEVER find a size Large Cubs Tshirt at any of the sports apparel specialty stores.
• Nowhere do I get called, "Mam" more than at the mall . . .arrghhh talk about feeling old.
• The comfy couch areas that run down the center of the mall are occupied by 95% males over 40 years old and 5% by mothers breastfeeding. PS. 10% of those males are in a deep catatonic sleep.
• The best sale items are always in the back of the store, 75% off, 50% off clearance prices, you just have to hunt sometimes to find where they are.
• Strollers are much more "mall" accommodating these days, they have cup holders, places to put your bags, big wheels for easier pushing, extra seats for other kids, some designer actually listened to some shopping moms that's great!
• I always feel happier after I walk through the Disney store, even if I don't buy anything, it's gotta be the music.
• Why don't they put the GAP, Baby GAP and JR. GAP all in one store? Why do they make 3 separate stores, makes no sense . .
• I don't care how tacky it is, Spencer's Gifts is still the funnest store to walk through in the mall.
• Required to buy a Jamba Juice and people watch for awhile.
• "NO lady! you can't straighten my hair with your fantastic new professional flat iron that you want to sell me!"
• The Jelly Belly store has the BEST black licorice jelly beans in the world.
• Why does Macy's only have one person working at the jewelry counter, so I can't pay for the cheap hoop earrings I want to buy, because the salesperson is helping the person shopping for diamonds . . .arrrghhhh!!
• You can never buy too many purses, it's a fact actually.
• No place do my legs cramp and feet hurt more than after I've been to the mall, time to go home until next time.